Parties
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"Parts of me that scared me Personal reflections on how overcome male supremacy "
[Pdf] By Chris Crass
Part 1: How I can be sexist? If I'm an anarchist!
"How I'm a sexist!". I was shocked. I had always behaved normally with women, and certainly not a classic tough guy or a misogynist bully. "But how I can be a sexist if I am an anarchist?" I could not help myself on the defensive, nervous. I believed in the struggle for a better society, I was part of the oppressed. The oppressors were the capitalists, is not it, it was they who benefited from injustice. When this happened, in 1993, I was 19 and had more than 4 of political activity.
Nilou, stroking my hand, I tried to explain patiently. "I'm not saying you're a villain, I'm just saying you have sexist attitudes. Look, there are behaviors that are clearly sexist, but sometimes not so obvious sexism is more subtle, comes in small details. Often cut me when I speak, and certainly pay more attention Cundo speaks a man who when he does a woman. The other day when we were having coffee with Mike, I acted like I was invisible, as if I was just there to contemplate you. A couple of times I tried to join in the conversation if I did not, continue as if nothing had happened. When you meet a few men, if you only do with you, if a woman did not you pay attention. The study group has become a forum for men long your rolls on this book and that other, as wise laying down the law, and tod @ s have to be there watching and listening. For a long time I thought that was my problem, if not participate was because they may not have anything interesting or useful to say. Also I thought maybe it was a paranoid, he was reacting stupidly, that the problem exitiosa only in my head and I had to overcome. But then I noticed the same thing happens to other women in the group, which is a feeling quite common. I'm not saying you have to blame everything but play an important role in this group, so you're part of this dynamic. "This conversation changed my life, I'm trying to meet the challenge that I checked, and this article is part of that process.
I have written this article to other middle-class white men, with leftist political ideas, and somehow involved in social movements. I want to address machismo from my own experience of dealing with sexism from an emotional point of view and psychological. I have chosen this approach because I want to question the personal dimension of these issues, because I think it is the most working effectively with men against sexism, and also because many partners we work with ask us not overlook these aspects. Rona Fernandez writes, of the Youth Empowerment Center in Oakland, "We must encourage those who have privileges because of gender roles to examine the role of emotions (or lack thereof) in the way they live their privileges. I mean this because I think that men also suffer under patriarchy, and one of the clearest ways in which machismo dehumanizes them is their inability to express or understand their emotions. " Clare Bayard of the group Anti-Racism for Global Justice released the men the following question: "If you took years to form your conscience policy, why do you think emotional understanding is innate, that requires no effort? "
This article is based on the work of women, black women and Latinas especialmete, writing and working against patriarchy in society and sexism in social movements. The work of Barbara Smith, Gloria Anzaldua, Ella Baker, Patricia Hill Collins, Elizabeth 'Betita' Martinez, Bell Hooks and many others offers a foundation of ideas, visions and strategies for working men White must take to overcome machismo. Every day there are more and more men within the alternative movements fighting against male supremacy. Many of us recognize that patriarchy exists, that as a result we have privileges, that sexism undermines the very foundations of our movements, and women, l @ s transgender and queer people and we have explained again and again and said very clearly: "Men have to do something about this topic, you must speak with you, we questioned each other and decide how you will fight against sexism." Still, there are many more white men in the social movements realize how sexist society is perhaps even the movements themselves, but do not acknowledge their personal involvement in this situation.
Lisa Sousa, who is a member of the Independent Media Center San Francisco, AK Press, told me that in the recent collective dicusiones gender had heard many people make comments like: "we all suffer oppression", "we should be talking about the class struggle" or "you are using machismo out of context to attack some people. " When pointed out that many women leave soon the groups in which men are the majority, he was told things like "men also leave the group, women do not go more than men, it is inevitable that people go in groups volunteers "or" we only have to look to other women, after all are not alone in the world. "
These comments are very familiar to me, and although it is tempting to distance myself from the man who made them, it is important to remember that until recently made them myself. I believe in movement building and collective emancipation, and so for me it is very important to connect with the people who participated in this struggle. As someone privileged privilege to organize with others, this connection means learning to value myself enough to see myself reflected in people they would prefer to distance, which would be easier to expose. It also means being honest about my own experiences.
When I had that conversation with Nilou, and she explain how the machismo, I remember I had to force myself not to close and try to listen.
The word "But" constantly assailed my mind, followed by "was a misunderstanding that was not what I meant, did not intend for you to feel that way, that was not what I wanted, I would love to participate more , did not understand, no one said they did not want to hear, we all believe in equality, I love you and would never do anything to hurt you, were the circumstances of the moment and not the machismo that made it to treat him well, I do not know what to do. " Ten years later, I realize how often I jump to the head such excuses "Buts." Inside me, I'm still much more like those "other" men than I care to admit.
Nilou spent many hours talking with me about sexism. It was incredibly difficult for me. My political views were based on a clearly defined dualistic framework of good and evil. If it was true that I was sexist, then my own understanding of self was in question and my framework for understanding the reality had to change. Although at that moment I felt awful when I look back I realize that those were times of great personal growth.
Two weeks later, the anarchist study group, raised Nilou hand. "This group is having macho behavior," and explained the examples that I already knew. The five men at the meeting were put on the defensive as I had done before. Other women began to talk. They thought the same about how things were working and were also fed up. The other men hallucinated and put on the defensive, and gave a list of reasons for what they saw as sexism were simply misunderstandings, misperceptions. With genuine sincerity we said, "But we all want the same, the revolution."
After the meeting, April, women who had more time in the group (more than a year), sat talk to me. He gave me example after example of sexist behavior. The men did not trust responsibilities, although it take more time in the group that many of them. It had never considered to provide public information on the group, nor had been asked his opinion on political issues. Some men joined our conversation and continued to deny that there was sexism in the group. April then clearly stated a concrete example that I had explained before, and the other said it was a misunderstanding. A few minutes later I returned to the same example and the men agreed, albeit reluctantly, that perhaps in this case it was sexism. April then said how they did not accept his arguments or those of Nilou, but accepted them when they were put forward by me. There was, I did not believe there was sexism in our group, but at that moment I saw him clearly. I felt terrible, like I had kicked the stomach. How could this be happening that both had tried to avoid? I was afraid to open his mouth again.
Two months later, sat quietly in a discussion group of men. We did not know what to say. We were scared, neviosos, tense, and do not put very many enegia to create a favorable environment for discussion about sexism. Nilou and April had suggested we spend a day talking about sexism, and we started talking in groups of men and women separately. We all wondered, "What are talking about women?" When the group met again, the discussion quickly took a turn very tense, the women were defending themselves and understand how their own experiences. I felt terrible and I could hardly believe my ears. I felt totally lost and without the slightest idea how to move forward.
Several people of different sexes were crying in the discussion pretty soon, desilusiondas and overwhelmed by feelings of distress and disability. My mother, who had observed part of the discussion, asked if she could say something. "You are talking about enormous and very difficult issues. Glad to see people your age talking seriously about these issues. It shows you really believe in the things that are struggling. This conversation can not be concluded in one day." I noticed what I was charged the atmosphere in the room when we looked at a @ l @ s otr @ s salt @ s, @ s much with tears in his eyes. It was clear that fighting sexism would entail more effort to learn to look to women as well during the group discussions. It was fighting a power system that operates in the economic, social, cultural and psychological and my supposed superiority as a man, I had internalized so well, it was only the tip of an iceberg built on exploitation and oppression.
Part II: "What historical class belong?"
"Do you know what kind are you?" Being a middle-class white man, I heard this question many times in the seven years I studied Women's Studies and Ethnic Studies. In history class of Negro Women, someone tried to help me figure out where I had to go.
well understand why I asked that question, and not only related to the classes of the University, but my social class within of a racist, patriarchal, heterosexist, capitalist very committed to maintaining a strong control social.Yo knew exactly what social class came, and my relationship with the Women's Studies and Ethnic Studies was complicated. I knew that some people did not want to go to those classes, and other even my presence made them feel uncomfortable. But on the other side much @ s professor @ s @ s vari students told me they were very content @ s that was there. All this helped me to realize the complexity of these struggles and that there are no easy answers.
I was four years Community College and then at the University of San Francisco State three more years. Most of my professor @ s were women and blacks or Latinos. He had grown up in a segregated community, where people of different ethnicities do not mix, and had few role models, teachers or authority figures who were not white people s.
What I read and studied at the University - the black women's feminism, the struggle for black liberation, the history of l @ s chic @ s, colonialism from the perspective of American Indians l @ s @ s, history of labor movements, queer theory, anti-racism from the perspective of immigrant and refugee women - had a profound impact on me. However, the fact that the people I were instructed and guided people of color and women of color in particular, was incredibly important for my development of psychological levels at that time I was not aware. That they were people of color and women with radical political views who guided my educational development was a huge subversion of power relations, and was one of the most important in my studies but was not part of any subject.
study in an environment where women and people of color were the most also had a big impact on me, it was the first time in my life where I was in the minority on the grounds of race and gender. Suddenly racial issues and gender were no longer an issue amongst many others, but key issues in the way of understanding and conceiving the world. Previously I had often wondered, and quiet, why are you harping on gender and race, now though the question had been invested, how you might not think about these issues on a daily basis?
Over time I developed a strategy for classes. During the first month trying to be discreet, straining to listen carefully to @ s rest. In the first week was a comment to distance clear of sexism and racism, capitalism and sometimes, as systems of oppression that are for me, this usually generated reactions of surprise and relief. Listening to my comrades s, opening their stories and perspectives, beginning to earn their trust and become more involved in discussions. This strategy aimed to fight my macho behavior, but also introduce the @ s others more openly.
Another part of the strategy was to provoke discussion of these issues in my Western Civilization class, Political Science and other subjects that participated alumn @ s who were in different careers and where almost tod @ sl @ s alumn @ s were men white. L @ s s comrades of color and the women they studied were clear that this was a responsibility they felt that I should assume. "They expect those of us s comments, and scorn as products of the anger, emotions, or victimization. You have to use your privilege to be heard by men and white people." The goal was not necessarily camber the opinion of the teacher, but open spaces for critical dialogue on gender, racism and social class l @ s otr @ s students. This was also a valuable learning experience for me, as they often gave the impression to the @ s other students that it was a cold person, angry, dogmatic, preachy and sometimes insecure in my ideas, which was not very helpful. If my goal had been put green men blanc l @ s @ s to relieve feelings of guilt and shame about being a white male, then maybe he was applying the right tactics. But for other people to identify with the anti-racism and feminism, had to be more intelligent and honest with myself.
I grew up thinking I was a guy going through my own linear path of progression, no past behind. The story was for me a set of interesting dates and facts, but without any clear connection with my life. I was a person in my own world. Then I began to learn to be white, male, middle class, able bodied, mostly heterosexual and a U.S. citizen does not only mean that I have certain privileges, but also gives me a past. I am part of social categories - white, male, heterosexual, middle class, groups created and shaped by history - which are considered the standard of "normality", from which others are judged. The image I had of my individual identity, of being "my own person," was joined by images of slave ships @ s, indigenous communities destroyed and burned, families destroyed, violence against women, white men of the ruling classes using white poor men to colonize white women, people of color and Earth.
remember sitting in a class of African American Women's History, one of only two white people and one of only two men among 15 black women, being the only white man. We were studying slavery, Ida B. Wells and his campaign against the systematic rape of enslaved Africans by their white masters, millions of violations that were covered and protected by law, while hundreds of black men were lynched on the pretext of protecting white women from black rapists. I sat with his head down, feeling the story in the tears from my eyes and nausea in my stomach. Who were those white men who felt about themselves? I was afraid and ashamed to look into the faces of black women in the class. "Although there is mixing of races for love," said the professor, "our people are of many different shades of black because generations of institutionalized rape." Who am I and what I feel about myself?
Part III: "This is my fight"
"I have no idea what role in the revolution could play heterosexual white men, as they are the base and body of reactionary power system" - Robin Morgan the introduction of "Sisterhood is Powerful."
sometimes experienced periods of hatred towards myself, I feel guilty, I have fear. When this happens, I know and feel I have a role in the struggle for liberation, and I know from my own experience I can do many useful things, but still I can not stop wondering, "I'll be cheating?" I have it clear, the quote from Robin Morgan is a good challenge that fight, but not worth getting caught in it.
I grew up believing that he was entitled to everything. I could go wherever and do whatever I felt like I wanted, and that any site would be appreciated and needed. Patriarchy and heterosexism taught me, in subtle ways and sometimes brutal, I had the right to the body of women, take my space and express my opinions and ideas when I wanted, regardless of the @ s rest. This is a socialization process very different from most people in this society, who are forced to remain silent, to eat their brown, to hide or disguise who they are, out of the way and never forget that should give thanks for the simple fact exist. I think it's healthy not to assume that you are always necessary, learn to share space and power, and work with others to find the paper you can meet. What is not healthy is so rare it is for the privileged by gender talk about these issues and support each other in this process of liberation.
Laura Close, an activist with Students for Unity in Portland, talks about this in his essay "Men in Motion:" Every day there are young men who decide to be linked to social movements, and meet with political debates about sexism and silence blame them without anyone to support them in the task of decolonizing their minds and change their thinking. Imagine if other guys with more political experience were to have coffee with the newcomers to talk about his experience as men within the movement, what they have learned. Imagine the good climate that would be generated among men if they give support and recognition to make progress in its fight against sexism. " Laura
Close encouraged men to accompany the movement of other men to engage in sexism. I knew she was right, but the simple idea of making me nervous. I had lots of friends with privileges because of their gender, but I was terrified to commit politically to uncover and explain my problems to combat machismo. He could publicly denounce the patriarchy and try to convince other men occasionally, but I was able to be honest about my own sexism, to connect the analysis and political practice with my own emotions and psychological processes, if vulnerable?
a minute. Vulnerable " what? Do you remember that in the classes of Women's Studies I claimed to be against patriarchy, racism and capitalism? The level of awareness among my fellow University of feminism (not to speak of his commitment) was so low that just reading one feminist book that occasionally "recognize that there is sexism and put me well before them. Although the level of awareness and commitment among activists in social movements is more, neither is much more. There are two things I am seriously worried throughout my political life: the genuine willingness to commit fully to my ideas, and a deep fear of not being llengües anywhere near achieving that commitment. I is much easier to make declarations against patriarchy in class, at political meetings and in my writings that feminist political practice relations s with my friends, my family or my teammates. Especially when men's political scene, like me, we take so little time to talk to each theme.
What scares me recognize? Every day I have to strain to hear the voices I identify as female. I know that my mind is faster than me. I know that my first reaction is to take more seriously the opinions of men. I know that when I enter a meeting, I can not divide people in status hierarchy (for the time they activ @ s, by groups that have formed part by what they have written and where it has been published, by whom are your friends @ s). I compare with ell @ s feel more competitive against other men. With women who identify as the ranking is similar, but also the sex appeal comes in the categories of my mind straight. What is sexual attraction and desire healthy, and how to mix or how to survive my learned behavior systematically sexualize women all around me? This problem is amplified by the daily reality that this society presents women as voiceless bodies, ready to satisfy the desires of men heterrosexuales, this is clear. But what does all this on my way to communicate with my co-workers, or emotional control? How do you translate the way I do love, need, express or conceptualize the love and affection? If I'm not talking about oral sex to my partner, or if I say I love him. I'm talking about if you really value the equity in our relations over belts regularly.
I realize that I have almost never lost my concentration on what a man is telling me to have sexual thoughts about him. However, I am often confused for being caught having sexual thoughts while speaking women, women who are great organizers, my friends, my comrades. I'm all for passion, healthy sexual desire and politics in favor of sex, that's not the problem. What is problematic is the power, the "right" that many men feel having to treat women as sex objects, the marginalization of women's participation by the filters may of heterosexual male desire. And I'd rather not put on the defensive so often, but I do. I get frustrated and I close when I argue with my partner about how power works among us s. Also when we talked about how we relate to the rest of the world and how this affects our relationship. I know sometimes I say "okay, I'll think more about it" when in fact I think "leave me alone."
This is not a confession to be forgiven. It's an ongoing struggle to be honest about the profound influence of patriarchy in my personality. Patriarchy haunts me. I am filled with doubts that someday I will be able to love honestly and healthily. My ability to open up and connect myself to open up and share. Whether I can build and share genuine, as equals with other people. I can see the scars of patriarchy in each of the people with whom I interact, and when I force myself to observe and take time to think it, I am filled with rage and sadness. Bell Hooks, in his book "All About Love" says that love is impossible when there is a will to dominate. "I can really love? I think so. That is possible through political practices for white males generated in opposition to patriarchy.
I think it's in the fight against oppression, in practice our commitments, and where we express our most valuable human qualities. There are moments, experiences and situations when I see that we collectively face of patriarchy, and that shows what we can. I think this is a job for life, and that the fund is also part of the struggle to rescue our own lives. And in this struggle, we realize that even against these systems of oppression so powerful, our ability to love, our beauty, our passion, our creativity, our passion, our dignity and our power grows. We can do it.
Postscript: "Working for this fight is concrete and effective"
Although the need to work hard psychological and emotional issues, there are many concrete steps that can be taken in the fight against sexism.
An activist in the struggle for the liberation of Palestine, wrote me suggesting "some things that can make men offered to take minutes at meetings, in charge of meeting places, look at @ s s obesity, photocopying or otherwise seemingly little glamorous. Encourage women and others discriminated against for their gender to assume the functions normally taken by men (to propose tactics and strategies, representing the group, moderating meetings). Explain why you think it would be cool to do so. Be aware of who you listen to and control your craving for leadership. "
She is one of the thousands of women and others of their gender discrimination have described clear and concrete steps that men can take to eliminate sexism and work for their release. There are lots of things that can be done. important question for me is what conditions are necessary to take this work seriously, prioritize and follow up. Besides talking with men of the topic, it is important that we care mutually for each other that all fulfill the part that touches us. There are many complex emotional issues that arise in the way and help each other is important not to lose and keep taking steps forward. We may ask, for example, how we are supporting women's equality, what are we doing to share responsibility and power in our organization, how we are improving our openness to women tell us what you think about our work, etc.
Each of these questions generates next steps to take. Examine and challenge our privileges is necessary but not sufficient. Cooperation between men to overcome male supremacy is just one of many strategies needed to develop a movement of liberation from the woman, multiracial, antiracist, feminist, homosexual and transsexual release from the working classes and capitalist, for collective liberation. We know that sexism operates as an obstacle against the construction of this movement. The question is what Harman to avoid, for the process to grow within us, and with it our ability to love ourselves and others. Ski
for white guys who work for social change and other people socialized in a system based on domination
good look who's in meetings - how many men, many women, how many white people, how many people in the South, if assumes that the majority are heterosexual, if people are not, and is out of the closet, what social class comes from the people.
're not supposed to know the people, strive to be more aware.
has often spoken and calculates how long. Count
times other people speak and calculates how time.
Be aware of how often you listen actively to what other people say instead of waiting your turn to think about what you say next time. Make
exercise ever going to meetings to listen and learn, go to a meeting and not talk.
Count the offer ideas to the group. Count the times you support other people's ideas for the group. Make
support the exercise of other people asking them to explain in more detail their ideas and proposals before deciding whether you support or not. Think
who receive recognition for their work and contribution to the group. Shows that recognition for the work of more people and do it more often.
often ask other people what they think about meetings, ideas, actions, strategies and visions. The white guys have a strong tendency to talk among themselves and develop strong bonds that manifest in the organization. This creates an internal organizational culture that is alienating to most people. Developing respect and solidarity across divisions of ethnicity, culture, class, gender and sexuality is complex and difficult, but absolutely necessary, and also liberating and fulfilling.
Be aware of how many times you talk to ask other people to do things as opposed to ask another people what to do.
think seriously about the term "will be necessary in the movement when you realize that you are not required in the movement."
Remember that social change is a process, and that our transformation and individual liberation is deeply connected with the transformation and social liberation. Life is deeply complex and full of contradictions.
This list is intended only for white guys or try to reduce us all into a single category. His intention is to interfere in the forms of domination which hurt our movement, and that hurt us as people. The white guys have a lot of work forward, but it's a very satisfying type of work if we really serious about equality, and if we develop our desire to achieve it.
everyday forms of domination are the glue that holds the hierarchical systems. The struggle against capitalism, racism, patriarchy, heterosexism and the state, is also the struggle for collective liberation.
No one is free until tod @ s what we are.
I do not think much wiped the refusal by Canada to the UN. I quite agree that Canada had no place in the Security Council. Anyway, Americans have a right of veto that allows them to fuck the mess as much as they want without the assistance of Stephen Harper. 
